I am not a particularly happy person these days.
Certainly this is not because of my financial situation. I have a six-figure job at some giant software corporation writing code no one will ever see. I can afford to buy whatever tickles my fancy because I have no family to raise, or even a romantic interest. I could stay here for years and make so much money I wouldn't know what to do with it all.
People often think that I am successful. Perhaps I am. I don't care. It doesn't matter to me. Things like cars and gaming rigs and fancy TVs are just a waste of space. The most precious material possession I currently have is a $130 custom plush I bought on a whim at a convention. The other things I buy are usually art prints or games that are on sale, never anything that costs more than $30. My total material purchases each month amount to 0.2% of my paycheck. Most of it goes towards supporting artists, not because I want more things.
A lot of my friends are artists. Most of them live in a dump. They don't have good medical insurance, and they survive on shitty jobs that pay almost nothing, if they can find a job at all. I can't tell you how depressing it is when all the people you care about are struggling to make ends meet and the most you can do is buy some of their prints. Every now and then some emergency comes up and I help them pay a particularly nasty bill, but none of this actually solves the underlying problem of them needing a better job.
The most important thing in the world to me is art and music. It is creativity in all its forms. Few people seem to share this viewpoint with me, and even fewer still put their money where their mouth is. To me, a world without art is dull and meaningless, and yet artists get no respect. They get paid almost nothing, they are scammed, and they are taken advantage of at every turn. The reaction most people have to this is "artists need to get a real job."
Oh, really? Is that what this is all about? Everyone should get a degree in applied mathematics and write software, huh? Whose going to draw all the icons? Whose going to draw the logo? Whose going to design the interface? Whose going to create the sound effects? Have you ever tried actually doing these things? It's hard! It's just as hard as writing software, but some people are better at drawing things than writing software. I'm tired of people thinking that artists are artists because they can't do anything else. Artists are artists because they can do things you can't do. They should at least be respected for that.
What do people even want with all this money? What are you going to do, buy another car? Does this make you happy, having a bunch of useless crap in your garage? Does buying a giant house that says "I'm richer than you are" make you happy? If you're going to tell my friends to get a real job, then surely you won't mind me telling you to get some real friends?
You know, friends who care about things other than consumerism. Friends who care about you because you're a human being instead of all the things you have. Friends who don't care how much money you have, or your social status, or whether or not you put on cologne in the morning. Friends who will go exploring with you, friends who follow you to conventions, friends who will fight to help you survive even when they themselves can barely pay the bills. Real friends are loyal to each other's hearts, not each other's things.
I've been on both sides of the fence, now. I can tell you that money stops mattering once you can pay rent on a nice place, buy food, and afford dentist appointments. Everything beyond that is meaningless and empty. It's just numbers on a screen. Sometimes it lets you buy an expensive toy for yourself that you wouldn't have been able to afford otherwise, but they are always just that - expensive toys. They fade with time.
There is a future for me out there. I cannot walk that road alone. I will not leave my friends behind simply because society doesn't think they're important. I don't know how I'm going to get there yet, but one of these days, I'll figure it out. That day, I will find a better job. A job that doesn't involve satisfying the whims of a bunch of old men in business suits. It will be hard, it won't pay very well, and I won't be able to afford a new car, but contrary to what everyone thinks, it is possible.
And I'll be a lot happier than I am now.